April 1, 1998

The gods-that-be decided that since I was SO happy in Barstow shooting my little pics at my little paper they decided to make life even more interesting and introduce me to a wonderful man - from now on known as my Traveling Companion.

This is just what I needed, yes? What is that old quote-curse "May you live in interesting times."? That's life now.

Lest y'all think I am complaining I am NOT. This is one cute, wonderful guy! He loves the desert as I do and we spend many a happy hour exploring old gold mines and shooting wildflowers. But try to fit dating/more than dating/RELATIONSHIP into a shooting schedule that has no schedule.

And dating raises all sorts of questions. Like, "why don't you have a couch?"

"Whaddya mean I need a couch to sit on - I have TWO computer chairs. Pull up a seat dude. The tv is that little box thing sitting on the extra dining room chair - very classy chair though - antique oak. So...you have to be kinda close to see the picture - see, we can still hold hands while watching the news if we put our chairs together."

What's more important a couch or an air conditioner in a black car in the desert? Or a new laser printer to replace the one that died.

My house looks like a Radio Shack outlet. Electronic devices plugged in for recharging everywhere. I walk in after work and the routine goes like this: Plug in camera. Plug in phone. Plug in scanner. Plug in Quantum. Put rechargeables in charger-upper. Check answering machine, turn on 'puter. Yep, I live at Radio Shack.

Once he took me to a nice dinner - and we are not talking about the special at Del Taco. A wonderful Italian place with good bard (yes, in Barstow).

Oh my, go to dinner in a little black dress and heels after working 12 hours on the road umpteen million miles away. And besides I had hat hair!

But after all I am SuperWoman - able to jump tall basketball players in a single bound - chase down a speeding train - shoot two sporting events and a beauty pageant that are going on ALL at the same time and do it WELL!

I rushed home, showered and fixed the hair and was ready in a JackFlash. The essentials were in little black purse - pager, cell phone and lipstick.

Romantic evening, holding hands across the table, staring into each other's eyes. Pager goes off. I forgot to file a pic. He graciously gives me the keys to his new car ( gulp he swallows - he knows how fast I drive. ) to hurry back to work. (Sports dude is impressed with dress - hey, Lara has real legs.)

Back to the restaurant...lovely dinner now a congealed glump of pasta and mushrooms floating in olive oil and butter. Traveling Companion understanding and forgiving. Really nice guy.

Do all photographers feel this compulsion to photograph their loved ones - in every minute detail and moment. Like in the shower?

"Hey, get out of here with that camera, I'm taking a shower!"

"But, look at the sunlight streaming through the window, backlighting you perfectly - it's wonderful and sparkly! Besides, the fish on the shower curtain hide your private - - selves."

Being always on call can be tough - even on my days off I feel responsible for getting images. On the way out of town this last Sunday we heard a cop chase in progress. Assault with a deadly weapon. Not often does this opportunity come up. Who knows what could happen. Guns could be drawn. Bad guys arrested. Who knows?? Adventure could happen!

His choice was to ignore it, after all it was my day off and we were headed out of town. I swallowed my news instincts and said sure we can just go without checking the scene - weekend reporter can shoot if necessary.

My stomach felt sick. Not cool to feel like I have to make that choice. But Traveling Companion, good guy that he is, drove to the scene anyway so that I could get whatever happened but I blew it. (That's another journal story!)

I know there is a balance somewhere - I just have to find it.

When deciding to have a relationship or rather a Relationship - note the capital "R" - one realizes that one has to make certain changes in ones home life as well as professional life.

Cooking has once again reared its ugly head. Something I said I would NEVER do again.

"You mean pretzels and string cheese do not a dinner make?"

Strangely enough I am sorta of enjoying it - the cooking. Probably just the novelty of it all.

Then there's shopping, like grocery shopping at CostCo. Wow, the first time together. So very, very domestic. Pushing the BIG cart around deciding on what to buy - his, mine, ours .... SCARY!!!!! Who pushes the cart?

And who drives? Whose car do we take? Major problem sometimes. His car is nice. I live in mine. To go anywhere in his means taking everything out of mine and transferring it to his. Except the reference library and maps...and sleeping bag and blankets...and extra water and rope...and first aid kit...and rock pick, chisel, sledge hammer...and, and, and...

"What if I need something?"

"Lara, we are going to Walmart for toilet paper - you won't need your rock dinker ( the pick) or sleeping bag.

Oh. Ok. But you just never know. Last time we took his car I forgot the scanner. NOT COOL. And since his car is nice, we don't eat in it. Now, I am a snacker by birth so driving long distances without knoshing on something is nerve wracking. And if we want to go off-road - well, that is just NOT an option. And I always want to follow the obscure desert dirt roads.

I suppose there are lessons to be understood in learning to be with someone. And the benefits surely outweigh the inconveniences. I must just be out of practice.

Compromise. A good word - easy to know the definition - hard to do - but worth it.

April 1, 1998

Lara Hartley

"...second star to the right and straight on 'til morning..." Peter Pan