It is funny how depression affected the way I shot. Some days I just picked up the easiest lens to get the job done and then I was home to hide under the covers for my lunch break. It seemed the only time I really liked the pics is when I was under stress and the ol' adrenaline was pumping. Those pics usually turned out pretty good. But as I looked back over a years worth of work (in 4 hours one night trying to get our contest entries ready) I discovered something - that even in the bleakest times I was still trying hard to make good images - not always successful, but I was trying. I just didn't enjoy it much past the moment. I was so used to sharing the photos with another person, that when that person disappeared from my life, a lot of the joy of creating was gone also.

I have kept in touch with Fritz and he was so encouraging, even in the darkest moments of real despair that I would ever want to write again - he just kept saying I would.

Thank YOU Fritzy.

For a while I toyed with the idea of moving on to a larger paper to escape my pain but then as the depression lessened I remembered "why" I came here - not the size of the paper, because I had already worked much bigger; but because of this place. This desert solitude that is my soul and its purity my peace.

So, for your viewing pleasure (I hope) some images from the dark times.

Burlington Northern Santa Fe Railway engine #741 balances astride the main line after the train it was pulling rear-ended another eastbound freight early Friday morning in the Barstow, CA yard. Three engines and several cars were derailed in the accident.

My thoughts: This was a pretty interesting shot to get because some railroad rent-cop tried to stop me from going down a county road where she had no jurisdiction. Sometimes I just HATE the secrecy of the railroads! Little did she know that I knew the law. Neener neener neener - and off we went across vacant lots and tumbleweeds.

My thoughts: I chose this one to run because it has rather lyrical quality about it. Not your ordinary news photo.

Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz goes trick-or-treating at the mall. My thoughts: Kids are SO easy. Especially when they are halfway adorable. :-)