Producer's Note: Huy Nguyen joins the project with this journal. Huy was one of the original photojournalists invited to join the project in 1998 . . . his schedule now allows his participation.

I Don't Feel Like a Real Journalist

February 21, 2000

Writing is very difficult for me. Much much more than photography. Pictures are finished when the moment’s gone but words can always be rewritten, and rewritten, and rewritten.

Why do I want to do this journal? Why now? Learning through the experiences of others is a very enlightening process.

Professionally, I hope some readers can benefit from knowing the details of my photojournalism work and learn from my many mistakes and misadventures. I have many ideas and experiences that I think are worth sharing. Ideas and beliefs that have served me well until now and could benefit someone somewhere.

Personally, I need this introspection to become a better photographer and a better person. Now is an important time for me to examine my personal development and growth through my photography. It’s strange for me to admit to myself that it’s no longer possible to separate my self-identity from my work. I see this project as a great place to examine my photo-philosophical outlook.

Some brief facts about myself:

I am a perfectionist.
I am a contrarian.
I am a know-it-all.
I am confident.
I am fearful
I am patient.
I am not sensitive.
I am not a machine.
I am not a believer.
I have high standards.
I take risks.
I can be objective to the point of being cold.

Through this journal, I will probably address a variety of themes relating to the photojournalism profession. At times they will be technically-oriented, other times philosophical. Since I have no idea who might be reading these entries, it will be difficult for me to be as direct as I’d like. I guess that is the general approach to these types of projects: just throw it out there and see who wants what.

(1/31/00) George Dawson, the 102 year-old co-author of the memoir "Life Is So Good", still attends literacy class everyday. Photo taken January 31, 2000.

To start with, I don’t feel like a real journalist. A visual reporter, maybe, but not a real journalist. Maybe it is because I came from the artistic side of photography. I first started out wanting to make beautiful pictures. That was what drawn me to photography in college. Soon after, I stumbled onto journalism and a career in photojournalism.

To me, being a journalist is the infinitely more difficult than being a photographer. I have high regards for those who have strong social agendas that reverberate through their work. They have causes for their talents. I have none.

I should have started doing this journal right when I started at The Dallas Morning News in January 1998. Then, I had little idea of what I was about to get into with this new job. The DMN is an extremely aggressive regional newspaper that prides itself on the quality of its journalists and the uniqueness of its journalism. Translation: we are different and we are better than anyone else. This is where the pressure comes from.

As DMN photographers, we are equipped with unbelievable tools and resources in order to produce highest quality work under any internal or external conditions. The bottom line is all that counts: can you deliver? Since working here, I have become a much better journalist.

(1/18/2000) At Greenwood Cemetery in Fort Worth, a horsedrawn carriage awaits the funeral procession of Fort Worth Police Chief Thomas Windham Tuesday afternoon January 18, 2000.

I grew tremendously as a photographer in Norfolk, and I became a journalist at the DMN. I am still learning along the way.

Behind the Viewfinder - A Year in the Life of Photojournalism
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